NFL Draft - Winners and Losers

Did your life feel a bit emptier a few hours ago? That is because the NFL Draft ended after seven rounds of excitement and intrigue. People say you cannot judge the success or failure of a draft for three years, but that won't stop me or any of the other 428 draft gurus from passing judgment.

Winners

*Me - for milking this "I hate the NFL Draft" cow as long as possible. There is so much material and so little time to make fun of it all.

*ESPN - for convincing people that "The Draft Matters" by showing a few success stories from the later rounds. What happened to the hundreds of other players who have gone in those late rounds and now flip burgers somewhere after getting cut during training camp? Did those picks matter?

Losers

*The Philadelphia Eagles - What were the Eagles thinking when they selected OG Michael McGlynn out of Pitt with their 4th round pick while Utah State's Shawn Murphy was still on the board? McGlynn has a receding hairline that concerned scouts about his durability and he only ran a 4 hour 20 minute marathon at the combine. Meanwhile, teams were buzzing over Murphy's inside technique (don't you know what that means?) as well as his graceful Downward-Facing Dog during the yoga session at Indianapolis. There is simply no chance the Eagles will win a game in 2008 after this pick.

*Anyone who watched more than 30 minutes of the NFL Draft - self-explanatory.

Here is a fun game to play: Pretend You Are Mel Kiper Jr.

Okay - everyone wants to know if their respective team did well or not during the draft. Of course, there is absolutely no way for Mel (you) to know, so you have to make something up to justify your salary. Now, here is the game - argue that each team is both a winner and a loser.

I'll go first with my team - the Dallas Cowboys.

The Cowboys were big winners at this year's draft. They sured up their backfield by selecting Felix Jones out of Arkansas and some other kid out of Georgia Tech. They also found a diamond in the rough in TE Martellus Bennett and swiped CB Michael Jenkins up with the 1st rounder they got from Seattle for the over-rated Julius Jones. Add Pacman Jones to the mix and the Pokes are poised for the post-season.

And the other side:

The Cowboys had a miserable draft this weekend. They lost out on Darren McFadden and settled for Felix Jones and some other kid out of Georgia Tech. Of course, they already have Marion Barber III in their backfield, so other needs (i.e. defense) should have been addressed. Dallas wasted its 3rd round pick on a tight end that will watch Jason Witten for the next five years. The aging offensive line got no help this weekend. Add Pacman Jones to the mix and the Pokes will be lucky to win 5 games next season.

Fun, huh? The thing is - I have no clue which take the "experts" will have on the Cowboys, but either one makes perfect sense. These draft experts are thieves ripping off the sports networks with their wild guesses disguised as insights. Remember this - Mel Kiper said Akili Smith would be a better professional quarterback than Donovan McNabb. Tell me that ain't stealing money.

Enough breaking down 2008 - time to start preparing for the 2009 NFL Draft! It is just 364 days away...